The Real World: Melbourne

So, I never got around to doing that footy post, and guess what? This isn't going to be it. I'm currently procrastinating a research plan for my policy class, and I've discovered that procrastination is even easier here than it ever was in the States, since when I'm at Denison, past a certain time of night I have no choice but to do my work because there's no-one to distract me. Whereas now that I'm on an opposite schedule from everyone at home, they can distract me late at night when my friends here are asleep (as I should be as well).

A few brief updates -- first, the last two days of Prosh Week: they were sort of a bust, to be totally honest. I burned out, which I sort of knew I might but had hoped that I wouldn't. I slept late on Thursday morning (partially because I was up so late the night before...I still haven't been sleeping all that well, to be honest), and I swung by for the Scav List drop at noon, but left shortly after that to run to a rehearsal for Vocal Ensemble and then I had my Medieval & Early Modern Music lecture, which I can't miss because Melanie (our lecturer) actually takes attendance.

Then I had rehearsal till 6:15, after which I went and spent some time helping out with Scav Hunt stuff, but I left that to go see David again after promising to return -- and seriously, finding the motivation to leave his place to go back for Scav Hunt was literally one of the top three hardest things I did that week. After going full throttle for the first three days of Prosh Week though, I guess it was more or less understandable that I was tired. I went back to help with Scav Hunt for a little while, but there wasn't that much to do because none of us wanted to get deported, and as such we didn't do anything on the black list. (Rumour has it that black list is currently on total lockdown because there were arrests and now there's a huge investigation. This is like third-hand gossip though, because I heard from Corey who heard from Andrew, so I don't have any details.)

Friday morning I was meant to do the Metcard Drop, but I was subbed out at the last minute because someone else wanted to do it and I'd stopped caring, haha. Apparently our team almost got arrested for public indecency (or something along those lines) as well, but the cop let them off. MUSEX ended up coming in last of the large teams, but we all had a fantastic time, and that's what we were really in it for.

So I slept almost all of Saturday, and spent most of the following week (this past week) recovering and getting back into the swing of things. We're pretty much at mid-term, since this past week was Week 6 and the teaching period is only twelve weeks long, so suddenly everyone is scrambling to do real work. I have one major assignment due this week (Week 7), three due next week (Week 8), break, then one due the second week after break (Week 10), and one due the week after that (Week 11). Then the teaching period will draw to a close, which is really crazy to think about.

At any rate, Friday night it was party party again, and Corey and I headed over to Perseverance, where (for those who don't keep up with me on Facebook or LiveJournal) David and I broke up. Needless to say, that was not a very good night. I'm not particularly devastated, which I suppose is a good thing, just...sort of out of whack. I mean, I did like him, and I still do, and I wouldn't mind still being with him, but if this is how things have worked out then I suppose I'm alright with that as well. It was always going to be over eventually. Of course, I was a bit -- ok, extremely -- annoyed with his poor choice in break-up timing and locale, but I did understand the fact that he didn't want to put it off, and I appreciate that for what it's worth. We had coffee Saturday afternoon to talk things over a little bit more and nothing's changed from how it ended on Friday night, but we're still friends and I was glad for the closure (and of course the fantastic coffee) somewhere that wasn't a loud club where I was distracted and caught off-guard.

But the fact remains that I've been seeing David for a month now, and I realised yesterday (well, Saturday, since it's now early Monday morning) that in that month most of my social schedule had more to do with him than anything else, which isn't really a good thing or a bad thing, just a fact. Only, the other fact is that David and I had been seeing each other since 11 August -- I'm not [totally] neurotic with dates; it was just particularly memorable because it was exactly one month after I arrived in Australia -- and that, combined with the fact that living in an apartment complex is not as conducive as a dormitory for meeting people and making friends.

So suddenly I'm faced with trying to re-establish a social life when everyone else has already done so. I will admit that this is a bit annoying. I do have friends, of course -- Arcadians, and Jarrod, of course, and MUSEX people, as well as a lot of people from IH (who are also friends with David). It's just I've sort of painted myself into a corner and it's not really his fault and it's not really my fault, it's just the way things happened.

So right now I'm less getting over him and more getting back into the way things were before him, which seems like a terribly long time ago, which in some ways I feel like it is and at the same time, the last month has disappeared so quickly I feel as though I've only been here a month at most.

At any rate, Saturday night I hung out with the Arcadians who are at University College (UC) -- Mandy, Isa, Becca, and Cassandra -- for dinner, and we talked in Becca and Cassandra's room for a while afterward. Mandy, Cassandra, and I had planned on going to a party, but instead Cassandra and I decided to go clubbing over in Fitzroy. On our way there we got sidetracked by Koko Black, which is basically a chocolate cafe. Becca, Becky, and I had had dessert there after the Carlton/Geelong match a month ago, but Cassandra hadn't been yet, so we went together and had some very decadent (and slightly expensive) chocolate and did the post-break-up commiseration that girls do.

We eventually made it over to Fitzroy, where we went back to Perseverance, which is the same club I'd been at the night prior when David broke up with me. Part of this was being cheap, because Perseverance doesn't charge a cover, and part of this was the fact that Perseverance is actually quite a good club. A large part of it was sort of a need to establish Perseverance as something other than "that club where I got broken up with."

The night was a bit of a flop. I don't know what was going on with Perseverance last night, but it was like 40-year-old mixer night or something, because the majority of the clubbers were 40+ (there was even a couple, clearly 50+, grinding on the dance floor, which was sort of like -- wow, that's fantastic for you guys, but none of us want to see it). Some guy kept staring at me, and eventually tried to get Cassandra to go dance with his friend, presumably so he could dance with me, but he wasn't attractive and came off as a bit of a douchebag. There literally was not one person there worth dancing or making out with, which was unfortunate.

But Cassandra and I had a great time dancing together, and we left the club somewhat early, shortly after that guy tried to get Cassandra to dance with his friend, and we just walked up and down Brunswick Street looking for a bar we could just sit at and talk or something, but nothing caught our eye. We eventually headed home, but the conversation and the company was wonderful, and I was glad to get out and having fun even if nothing really good happened. Girlfriends are always the best post-break-up company. Even if I wasn't particularly devastated, it was good that I wasn't alone.

I sort of wonder if this whole experience -- not just the whole thing with David, but the whole semester I'm spending here -- will become surreal once I leave. Like something that I intellectually know happened, but something that I feel so far removed from that it almost seems more like a dream. Even now I still wake up some mornings and wonder if it is a dream.

But, what's maybe most important is that I really don't regret anything that happened this past month. Two entries ago I said I didn't want to regret anything I did or didn't do, and I'm glad all of this happened. Denison is such a small bubble, with its tiny dating pool and cookie-cutter guys, and aside from being really glad that I met such a great guy and had a great time with him (even if it is over now), it was sort of a boost in self-esteem.

Not that my self-esteem was low to begin with, but after two years at a tiny school where all the guys are the same and not really my type (and there aren't enough to begin with), with summers and holidays at home where I'm stuck in the Bridgewater-Raritan rut of who I used to be, and being unable to go out and drink and be social like a "real" adult could be, I hadn't met anyone new in a long time. It's hardly an "I'm desperate" situation, but when you're in what seems like a holding pattern for so long, you start to wonder if it will ever end. Or if it's not really a holding pattern, and it's just you being unappealing. I mean, it's not as if I can't be happy without a man, but it's always nice to have one as well.

Melbourne feels more like reality than Denison or Bridgewater ever do, and it's a bit of a relief that I can meet people, and guys are interested.

So. I'm going to attempt to get my work done now so I can sleep. Rest assured that the list of post topics grows ever longer, and they're not all point-by-point recollections of what I did each day. There's one rolling around in my head about Greek life (hee!) that I hope to get written sometime this week.